Francine and the Overprotective Helicopter Parents
by Brianna Fogg
Summary: (NOTE: This is based on my parents. Instead of chewing them out and getting into huge trouble, I'm taking my anger out on this story.) After a news report on a kidnapping, Francine's parents go berserk and won't let her even step out of her apartment by herself anymore, depressing and angering Francine beyond end. Rated K for some very mild violent and scary themes.
1. Opening Cutscene

Arthur Read was sitting at the kitchen table.

"You know how it feels when something you used to be able to do, well, you couldn't do it anymore?" asked Arthur to the camera. "Like, one time..."

Fade to Fern, writing a poem in her diary.

"_Fern was writing a poem once,_" Arthur narrated.

"The...end." Fern put her pencil down on her desk and leaned back in her swivel office chair to prop her feet up on the desk. She sighed happily. But, just as she was beginning to relax, the chair slid out from under her.

"_Then she leaned back too far in her chair and she fell._"

"Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa!" She tried her best to regain her balance and get the chair standing upright again, but she fell out of her chair anyway, and landed right on her hand. There was a loud snapping sound, and Fern grabbed her wrist and screamed bloody murder.

"_She broke her wrist that day. She had to go to the hospital, and Fern wasn't allowed to write for almost two months._"

Fern was next shown in bed with a cast on her arm. She sobbed and wiped her tears on her cast.

"_And then there was the time that I was batting for our baseball team. It was the bottom of the final inning, with already two outs..._"

Another flashback showed Arthur at the bat. The scoreboard showed that the score was 5-6, Lakewood needing one more run to catch up with Mighty Mountain, and two more to win. Buster threw the ball at home plate. But Arthur swung too early and the ball went into the catcher's mitt.

"Steeeerike two!" shouted Binky, the umpire.

"Swing later!" said Arthur's parents from the bleachers. "Come on! You can do it!"

The windup came, and then the final pitch of the game. Arthur swung as hard as he could...and ended up whacking himself in the face. Arthur fell backward, out cold, just as the last pitch of the game landed in the catcher's mitt.

"Steeeerike three! And he's out!" yelled Binky. Oh, the irony in that sentence.

Arthur's buddies ran over to him to see if he was okay.

"Arthur, wake up! The game's over, and it's time to go home!" cried the Brain into Arthur's ear.

"Well... technically, he is at home," joked Buster, stifling a snicker.

"Come on, Arthur! I have to get home and watch _The Jazz and the Wreckless_!" added the stuck-up rich girl Muffy.

Arthur made an unconscious coughing noise, which everyone mistook as a sign of life.

"He hears us!" everyone murmured to themselves.

"Dang it, Arthur! Your lousy swinging skills made us lose the stupid game!" said Francine, kicking dirt into Arthur's face.

Jane, David, and D.W. ran up to check on Arthur and weren't too happy to see him sprawled on the ground, head bleeding intensely.

"Arthur!" Jane rubbed Arthur's shoulder, and no response came from him. "Are you all right?" She checked his pulse. It was slightly weak, but it was there. "We have to get you to the hospital." She wrapped several bandages around Arthur's head.

David was no less concerned than his wife, but his voice remained calm as he told Jane what they were going to do. "On three, we'll both pick him up and take him to the car! One... two... three - lift!"

Struggling, they both picked up the K-O'd aardvark and strained as they carried him across the parking lot. D.W. just stood there and blew a raspberry at Arthur, but David snatched her away. They sat him down in the car and buckled him in. The flashback ended and it was back to the present day.

"I cracked my skull that day. I'm pretty lucky to have survived that... wait. Do you notice a recurring theme? Like, everyone ends up with broken bones? Hmm, let's change thr subjec -"

"**ARRRRRTTTHUUUUUR**!" D.W., Arthur's annoying little sister, interrupted.

Arthur flinched. D.W.'s shrill voice was almost too much for him to handle.

D.W. sprinted into the kitchen and grabbed Arthur's arm, practically dragging him into the den. They both sat down on the couch. "Look at what's happening on the news!"

"Hello, it's Marietta Brownie, and this is Channel 6 Action News," a reporter announced as a logo engulfed the screen. "Our top story this week: a 32-year-old man named Daer Ruhtra has kidnapped a nine-year-old girl in Elwood City this weekend..."

"Holy CRA - " started Arthur.

"Roll the episode title card!" D.W. shrieked, realizing that Arthur was about to utter something inappropriate.

FRANCINE AND THE OVERPROTECTIVE HELICOPTER PARENTS!

Francine rode her bike into the circle as the writing credits flashed on the bottom of the screen. "Yeeeee-haaaAAAAHH!" Pal, Arthur's dog, suddenly appeared and she swerved to avoid him. She lost her balance and fell off her bike, skinning her knee in the process.


	2. Francine Sings

Francine was chilling in her room, sitting in her bed, listening to music on her dOpi.

"_Oh, yeah, la-la-la-la!_

_Francina! Francina!_

_Quit hanging out with Tina!_

_Your boyfriend's jealous_

_And he's going to kill you if_

_You don't stop hanging out with Tina,_

_Francina! Francina!_" she belted out obnoxiously loudly as she sang along to a pop-rock song.

Catherine burst through the door holding her ears. "FRANCINE! PLEASE! QUIET!" she shouted over the music and singing.

"_Francinaaaaa-aaAAA-AA-AaAAaAA-AAaaAAAA!_" Francine screeched, holding the final note, rather badly_._

"**SHUT UUUUUUUUPPPPPP!**" screamed Catherine, almost in harmony with Francine! Both of their voices managed to crack their bedroom window in several places.

"What is it now, Catherine?" sighed Francine.

"Please turn down that stupid music, and let me get ready to go to my horse-riding lessons!" Catherine sat some clothes down on the bed.

Francine scoffed and shot her sister a dirty look. "Whatever."

Catherine narrowed her eyes. "_What _did you say?!"

"I said, 'Whatever!'"

Catherine's face turned red as she growled and lunged at her younger sibling. Amazingly, Francine caught her in mid-air and began punching her in the face.

"I'll play my music as loud as I want to!" Francine shouted, enraged.

"Nuh-uh!" argued Catherine, squirming out of Francine's grip and headlocking her. "I was born seven years earlier; therefore, I'm older, and I boss you around!"

Francine somehow escaped from the headlock and threw Catherine onto her bed. She then ran off laughing. Catherine crossed her arms and sulked, knowing she had just lost.

* * *

Francine sat down on the couch in the living room and turned on the television. She found a show on NBS with a drunken English bear performing a comedy sketch.

"No one survives!" he slurred. "I come home, and there's _My Little Pony _on the telly!" He poured a cup of whiskey. "That's when my brain...starts doing things." He downed the shot in one big gulp. "Anyway, my brother was watching the telly, and I had this really long spoon. I shoved really hard and fast in his eye! It was lovely." He hiccuped. "But now I had *hic!* to bury his dead body!

"Suddenly *hic!* I heard the front door open, with Mum and Dad coming in." He clasped his hands to the sides of his face. "**Oh, no! **I'm in big bother! They're *hic!* going to come here, and find out my brother *hic!* is dead! Suddenly I made a breakthrough. I stuffed *hic!* my brother in the fridge." He took another whiskey shot and smiled as he relaxed. "And everything was lovely once again. *hic!* Wonderful.

"Later that day, we sit down to *hic!* eat, and my dad goes to the fridge. He saw Brian in there, mouth open, eyes staring, tail stiff, *hic!* dead in the fridge - and that's when I get into _really big trouble_ - "

Francine sat on the couch, not moving a muscle. She wasn't laughing, or even grinning. "Booooring!" she said with a roll of her eyes. She reached for the remote control, but it was quickly snatched away from her.

"Hey, Frankie, mind if we watch the evening news?" said Laverne, sitting down on the couch. Francine didn't like that idea at all.

"I'm going to my room!" she declared, doing just that. She plugged her headphones into her dOpi and turned on another artless pop tune.

"_La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-laaa-laaaaaaa!_

_Hey, Moode, don't make thiiiiiiings worse than they are noow,_

_Take this sad song and throw it in the garararararrrbaaage,_

_And don't forget to take this lady and shove her inside your chest,_

_And that'll make everythiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing all beeeeeeeettteeeerrrrr!_"

A timecard appeared suddenly. "One hour later," read the French Narrator, who is in Arthur's universe why?

"FRAAANNNCIIIINNNE!" boomed Oliver's voice from the kitchen. "It's dinner, and plus, we need to talk to you!"

_Great. Just great, _thought Francine, kicking her shoes across the room as she trudged into the kitchen.

(**A/N: **I'm sorry this chapter is so short. I'm sick today, which gave me the perfect opportunity to finish this chapter and get it up on the site. Thanks for being patient.)


End file.
